Is it possible to become addicted to sex toys?

Q. Does using a vibrator make it harder to have an orgasm the real way?

A. First of all, there is no "real way" to have an orgasm. Think about it: If women were meant to have orgasms only during intercourse, then the clitoris would be where the cervix is — at the very end of the vagina, where only the penis could get to it. Instead, the clitoris — and all of its 8,000 nerve endings — is right in the middle of the labia, easily accessible for stroking, vibrating or countless other types of stimulation.

The fact is, the easiest (and usually, the most intense) way to reach orgasm is through direct stimulation of the clitoris or clitoral area. A vibrator can do this unbelievably well. Indeed, this wonder toy can be so successful that some people get impatient with slower methods of arousal. Should that scare women — or men? I don't think so! Research shows that there's a definite correlation between orgasms and sexual satisfaction (the more frequently you climax — whatever the method — the more sexually satisfied you'll be). More good news: There's an even stronger correlation between sexual satisfaction and relationship satisfaction.

The bottom line: If you're concerned that your vibrator habit will render your partner obsolete, stop worrying! Relationships tend to benefit when couples are open to a full repertoire of sexual choices. Even more important: Most women concur that the feelings that arise from making love with a partner are so extraordinary that the intensity of the climax — or even whether one happens at all — doesn't matter. So work on achieving more (and better) orgasms and don't worry about achieving them in a particular way. And remember: Even a vibrator can get a bit boring if it never gets a break.